Sailing and letting go…
“Being together with other men at our last group reminded me of when I used to run home after school filled with excitement to hang out with my friends – I have missed this!”
Most of us have wives & partners who often get together with their fellow women & a lot of us have felt for some time a little unsure of where & how we fit together as a group of men. Most of us don’t want to meet in a pub or on the sports field. Some of us are new to parenting, and some well into this journey or beyond. We are working on how to be a friend, a father, a son, a husband, and a boyfriend. Some of us have lost/left our main source of income, some have physical limitations & are beginning to discover what we really enjoy doing. Some of us are exhausted & want time to rest. Together we are finding out how to stand shoulder to shoulder with other men – men who are willing to explore what being a man could look like & how we gather & share who we are in an open & kind space.
Our first gathering was held on some magical land near Trencrom that had been slowly wooded over the last 30 years, from a bare open patch to a varied dense woodland. Our group gift of time and practical effort to the land host was an hour of moving timber. This elderly owner lives alone & independently, but she couldn’t gather firewood like the 6 of us could, so we filled her woodshed ready for the next chainsaw session that another volunteer would complete.
Our session unfolded as we did, slowly & with intention. We each created a boat that was made from driftwood & beach plastics. We had no rules, only creativity was asked for. One man spontaneously burnt his galleon on the fire; when we asked him why he shared he didn’t know. We decided together it was a clearing out of something, a letting go, a form or shape that no longer served him – but it was a lovely boat!
One man had come pre-prepared with some vegetables, others of us had bought a carrot, garlic & a sweet potato. After some group chopping we made a remarkably tasty stew.
Amongst us we have a pharmacist, a fencing expert, a gardener, a carbon neutral transport & solar power planner / designer, an artist, builder & fitness coach, a sound bath therapist – we are quite an eclectic mix. We are men who have been protesting, raising their children, raging with anger over the last few years, letting go of loved ones, fighting for their marriages, healing our wounds, expressing how we feel about the world around us, uncovering our expectations of ourselves & discovering who we are behind the roles & stepping in to what we would like to offer in service.
I like to think we are gently creating a space for men to gather. A different space where we have no leaders or agenda– we take turns to offer our skills/passions up into the mix with each other. This is a sacred time for men; where we turn up when it feels good, where we can be ourselves & be ourselves. It is an opportunity to lean into each other, share our dreams & fears & probably most of all to be witnessed by other men & held before we crash.
Our next Men’s group is on 20th May at Gwithian Beach. We will be learning and practicing making sand mandalas – sitting together, catching up & cooking up some tasty food. Come along – we would love to see you there. Please email to let us know you are coming growthincornwall@protonmail.com – or just turn up! A £5 donation is welcome.
A sand mandala is an ancient, sacred Tibetan Buddhist art form, which represents a perfect universe. The geometric patterns and colours represent a map to transform the ordinary human mind into an enlightened mind.
